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Dearest Future Baby,

When it comes to baking, I am a failure. Admittedly, after 6 years of marriage I just started concocting meals this past summer with regularity. But I seem to have a knack for making simple, flavorful meals. By the time you are into solid foods, I will be quite the cook, so don’t even ask if we can go to McDonald’s.

My desserts, on the other hand, have been disastrously awful. Dearest future baby, this will not improve, I fear. I called an end to my brief baking tenure this past Saturday after another failed dessert attempt. Upon my announcement, our darling Patrick (daddy to you), always encouraging and blindly supportive, said, “Nooooo! You’re great at baking!” I countered this kind falsehood with facts.

Let us review my last three attempts at baking dessert:

  1. Oatmeal cookies (for your daddy’s birthday). I had to make two batches. The first were hard as bricks and had less flavor than dog biscuits — trashed. The second batch was edible, according to your dad. But we’ve already established he is known for supportive white lies.
  2. Biscotti. Speaking of dog biscuits, I managed to somehow bake all flavor out of almond-y, nutty, sweet biscotti. I gagged a bit when I tried one, then I tried another one with the same result — trashed.
  3. Apple crumble. We found a great farm we want to take you to. We went apple picking this weekend and returned with lots of baking apples (red gravensteins) and snack apples (mcintosh and red gala). So your daddy and I peeled, sliced, measured, and mixed. I got overzealous and added lots of lemon zest. Big mistake! Lemony apples and crumble that never really baked… We each forced a portion down our crumble-holes and agreed it was quite terrible — trashed.

In sum, if the point of baking desserts is to make a mess, dirty dishes, and waste food by immediately trashing it, I am an unmitigated success. Perhaps I even deserve an award.

So, dearest little-one, I hope you take after me and prefer savory over sweet 364 days/year. If you are like your dad, however, you will have to give baking a try when you are old enough… I will not make you suffer my attempts.

Love, Your patiently waiting mommy

P.S. Great news! My blogging pal, and fellow Harry Potter fan, recently posted a recipe for apple butter. Not only is this an oven-free recipe, but we get to use our sloooow cooker! So the rest of our apple harvest will not go to waste and my tea-and-toast mornings will be extra delicious this fall and winter!

"Please don't make me eat the whole thing!"

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Apple farm or bust!

Lulu got apple picking tips from a piglet in the know

A bunch of Red Gravensteins sitting in a tree

There was a pumpkin under our favorite apple tree

Lulu lugged our apple treasure to the car

What do we do with all these apples?

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