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I tried to avoid writing a blog about this, but nothing else is coming to me today, and honestly this is just on my mind…

Why am I not pregnant yet?

Here’s what I’ve done to prepare:

Lulu drinks for me... on my desk. Keeping it professional, Lu!

1. Cut back caffeine (1/2 cup/day)

2. Started taking prenatal vitamins

3. Removed sashimi and “dangerous” cooked fishes from diet

4. Willed it to happen (and maybe did some witchcraft)

5. Started taking my temp in the morning to get to know my cycle better

6. Purchased an OPK

7. Only imbibe alcohol on “safe” days

8. Willed it to happen (with The Secret-type intensity)

9. Boots have been knocked

10. I’ve replaced my psychotic workouts with more moderate ones

Did I mention I’ve willed it to happen?

To tie into the theme of this blog — “the miracle of birth” — I’m guessing it has something to do with patience and I’m just at the beginning stages of learning about that…

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I’ve been reading up on diet. My first impression: Everything I enjoy drinking is full of drugs.

Obviously, the no alcohol rule makes plenty of sense to me. A sacrifice I will happily make for my future dumpling. Wine at the end of the day has been more of a ritual than a de-stresser. I typically have two companions in the kitchen when I cook dinner: Patrick and a glass of vino. The glass half-full approach to cutting out wine while I cook: More room on my teeny kitchen workspace!

But I have to just-say-no to caffeine too?! I guess I *knew* this–a bit of info tucked in the back of my mind–but I never *really contemplated* the policy. It seems cruel! I alternate between coffee and black tea to jump-start my day. I don’t even count any occurence prior to my first cup of coffee as part of my day! Sorry, Officer, I can’t accept this ticket. I am still en route to Starbucks. And there is no kidding myself. I can’t do decaf. Decaf coffee is like turkey bacon–the resemblance to the real thing leaves me more disappointed than satisfied. (Thank goodness bacon is on the OK list!)

Well, it looks like I’m left with water. (Yes, I realize I’m ignoring a host of healthy options.) I’m a fan of the stuff, but there is a reason coffee, wine, and black tea were invented. Because they taste good and tickle our brains. Double yum!

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