Did the title make you hungry? That is why you are reading this post. Welcome!
Today, I want to share a lesson with you: A step-by-step guide on how to make your ordinarily boney feet swell like… well, things that are known for being super swollen.
1. Get pregnant. This may take a while. (See archived posts)
2. Brag about how you haven’t had swollen appendages so far, then begin week 38.
Gorgeous veggies and herbs!
3. Decide to make an Asian-inspired sesame peanut noodle salad.
4. Drive to local Asian market for green onion and cilantro. Easy peasy! It is only 5 mins away! And for a bushel of both you only pay $1.50. Cash only.
5. Cook pasta. We had linguine, so I used that.
6. Cook edamame.
7. Chop raw veggies and herbs: garlic, cilantro, red peppers, green peppers, green onion. Omit carrots since they went bad. Oops! Omit bean sprouts because you just aren’t into them.
8. Shell edamame to add to veggies (pictured to the left). Eat extra edamame and share with Patrick. If you don’t have a Patrick, all the better, more for you!
Chicken in some foil
9. Grill chicken flavored with sea salt, fresh ground pepper, curry powder, and coriander. Have Patrick help you with this stage because the grill pan is splattering and you can’t handle it. If you still haven’t got a Patrick, deal with oil splatter or use sparingly to avoid this problem altogether.
10. When linguine is finished, add a bit of sesame oil to noodles to prevent from sticking. Pop in fridge.
11. Put veggies in fridge. Keep them crispy!
12. Slice cooked chicken into thin slices and add to fridge too. I stored these in tin foil since I ran out of room in fridge. (See blurry picture to right.)
Saucy!
13. Kill this healthy collection of ingredients by making this fabulously fatty dressing: 1tbsp of sesame oil, 1 tbsp olive oil, 1 tbsp soy sauce, a 1tsp of chili oil, a squeeze of honey, juice from 1 lime, and 1/3 cup of peanut butter. Stir it up.
14. Combine pasta, veggies, chicken, and toss with dressing. Sprinkle sesame seeds on top!
15. Put finished product in fridge. Allow flavors to mix and mingle and chum up before eating.
Salad for days!
16. Suddenly become aware of the fact that you have been on your feet for 2+ hours (world’s slowest cook?) and they hurt REALLY, REALLY bad.
17. Look down at feet and notice they have ballooned! You now have fat balloon animal feet! But you have also made a great noodle dish. So kick your feet up and come to terms with the fact that you have 0-28 more days of fat feet to look forward to. But bonus, you also have 1-3 days of peanut sesame noodles to look forward to!
18. If you follow this guide, more or less, you too can have delicious peanut sesame noodles and swollen feet. Now it is your turn to give it a go!
As long as it doesn’t get me pregnant, bring on the swollen feet!
You can’t have it all, Ranman.
That sounds good. Not the swollen feet part, but the food part. I might try to find some pregnant woman to make me that for lunch.
The food part is really good! We decided we should double the recipe because those noodles didn’t last as long as we’d like. The swollen feet, on the other hand, stick around for days.
This recipe sounds so delicious!! I’m going to have to try it now. I’m sorry that it came with a price though.
If it makes you feel any better, I’m a slow cook too… You’re coming into the home stretch as far as swollen feet though!
The noodles are sooo good! And so worth the enlarged feet! Hooooome stretch is right!
Is it okay if I skip the knocked-up part and just try the recipe?
You can try it that way… But way to diverge from the guide at STEP ONE! Sheesh, some people!
Love the post and the great recipe. Sympathise with the sore feet. Difficult at this late stage to get comfy. Wishing you all the best for the delivery
It is surprising how uncomfy one can be right now. But on good days I tell myself it means I’m closer to L&D!
The noodles are great comfort food. Especially on a hot summer day.
This post was as good as that salad looks (I should clarify that this is indeed a compliment). I do not miss the swollen feet days. You will be amazed at how soon that will end after Miss Baby is born.